Pathological liars get extremely angry when confronted with proof of their falsehoods. They often balk at innocent questions about their fabrications. Many pathological liars believe their lies and find it more comfortable to lie than tell the truth. … When questioned or confronted, they revert to anger and hostility.
Liars smile, nod, lean forward and make eye contact while listening — characteristics that are often associated with honest and friendly people. Don’t be fooled by this; their charm is just a cover. “Ums” and “uhs” are dead giveaways of a lie, so frequent liars have learned how to think fast.
Calm down, think, and then deal with the situation. Listen to your partner’s explanation and try to understand why they lied. Try to forgive them and leave the lie in the past. Do not remind your partner about past lies every time you are in an argument.
Liars tend to increase the duration of their pauses and they do tend to increase latency (speak more slowly). Also, contrary to common belief, liars do not necessarily look nervous. Some skilled liars can even appear to be very calm and collected. Sociopaths may also not appear anxious.
Liars and truth-tellers both have pauses in their speech, but good liars avoid answering questions, scientists say. DESPITE WHAT YOU MIGHT think, it is almost impossible to tell a liar from the way they talk, according a new study.
Answering a question with a question is a huge red flag indicating the possibility of deception. … They typically respond, “I didn’t do that.” Deceptive people are evasive, and when they are caught off guard, they need extra time to think of a believable response.
It follows that narcissists may overestimate their lie-telling ability and report frequent lying merely because they tend to self-enhance desirable abilities. Specifically, narcissists’ self-assessments of their lying abilities and self-reports of lying may not be valid indicators of their actual lying behavior.
Pathological lying is a symptom of various personality disorders, including antisocial, narcissistic, and histrionic personality disorders. Other conditions, such as borderline personality disorder, may also lead to frequent lies, but the lies themselves are not considered pathological.
Experts say that it’s common for liars to get defensive during an argument.
Why They’re Toxic: Simply put, habitual liars leave no room for trust in their relationships. They’re basically trust-zappers. So if you’re continually catching someone in lies, don’t start lying to yourself by thinking his/her behavior isn’t that bad. It is bad — and you don’t have to put up with it.
“Research has linked telling lies to an increased risk of cancer, increased risk of obesity, anxiety, depression, addiction, gambling, poor work satisfaction, and poor relationships,” says Deirdre Lee Fitzgerald, PhD, assistant professor of psychology at Eastern Connecticut State University in Willimantic.
If you want to repair a relationship after a betrayal, forgiveness is key. Not only will you need to forgive your partner, but you also may need to forgive yourself. Blaming yourself in some way for what happened can keep you stuck in self-doubt. That can hurt the chances of your relationship’s recovery.
You can’t always change the behavior of a liar, but you can change how you feel and react to them. Once you learn to change your emotions about a situation you begin to see a lot more options. If you are honest with the situation you will realize that your happiness is more important than their behavior anyways.